Have you ever wondered why my boss treats me differently than others?
It may feel like your boss is playing favorites, giving you an unfair treatment or making you feel small at work.
We know it’s frustrating and can leave you wondering about your worth and value in the workplace. It can make you question the intentions of your boss. Does my boss secretly want me to quit or playing some other game?
But worry no more, as this article will cover all you need. It will give you powerful insights into what could be the reason for such unfair behavior from your boss.
We will also equip you with effective strategies so you can face this problem head-on and foster a healthier working environment.
Without further ado, let’s go!
- Unfair Treatment in the Workplace
- Recognizing the Unfair Treatment at Work
- Signs of Unfair Treatment at Work
- What to do when my boss treats me differently than others?
- FAQ
- Conclusion
Unfair Treatment in the Workplace
First of all, take a sign as you are not the only individual facing this issue. Millions of others like you face unfair treatment in the workplace.
This unequal treatment can not only affect your job satisfaction but also take a toll on your personal and professional development.
But we will not let you do what most others do, reacting to unfavorable events as mere observers and sabotaging themselves and their careers.
Rather, we will enable you to find the cause of the unfair treatment at the workplace and then devise strategies to address this issue efficiently.
Recognizing the Unfair Treatment at Work
If you are doubtful whether my boss treats me differently than others or it is just in my head, you should first get an understanding of what actual unfair treatment is in the workplace.
More often than not, people remain ignorant and clueless about what unfair treatment is. They may receive harsh time from their boss but let them abuse them.
Or on the other hand, they become paranoid and began to label everything occasion, every encounter as an unfair one which only adds to the misery in the long run.
Therefore you should develop a clear understanding of what unfair treatment at work looks like so you won’t be fooled by the plays of your boss.
Signs of Unfair Treatment at Work
Look for the following signs in the behavior of your boss to see if he is treating you differently.
1. Exclusions from Opportunities
The most vital sign to look for is your exclusion from growth opportunities.
If you constantly find growth opportunities like promotions, important projects, or big presentations with higher management to be snatched away by your boss and handed over to your colleague, there is a good chance of unfair treatment.
Your boss could try to disguise this act and try to turn your eye blind by saying things like our company policy doesn’t let to interact with higher management, your time will come, you should wait for the right opportunity, and things like that.
Just look at the other employees in your department, are they also not being let to run projects or big presentations? If not then it has nothing to do with the company but only with your boss who is treating you unfairly.
2. Lack of Recognition
“Despite my best efforts, I can’t help but notice my boss treats me differently than others, is it intentional?”.
If it sounds like you, your doubts should become clear as this one is as clear as a day regarding the unjust behavior in the workplace.
Lack of recognition in the workplace is quite common.
You have exhausted yourself in a project and gave your all however your teammate is collecting all the praise while you are just collecting dust.
Whatever the work you do in the organization, it’s not your personal work. And every piece of it deserves recognition like who did what.
If you achieved something in a project or made a contribution, you by all means and rights deserve recognition for the part you did, doesn’t matter how small.
Your boss may try to distract you by saying that your part was seemingly small as compared to your teammate’s or anything similar to justify the fact your name was not mentioned in the credits.
It could be simply a way to cover the tracks.
3. Microaggression and Biased Behavior
This one is subtle but deadly enough to ruin the chemistry.
If your boss is secretly holding a grudge against you, he may try to vent out his frustration through means of microaggression and biased behavior.
It is easy to miss these signs so you should pay some attention.
If you notice some micro-moments of aggression when interacting with your boss, such as discriminatory remarks, passive-aggressive attitude, or turning critical towards on the slightest of chances then behaving normally, these are the clear tell-tale signs of microaggression and biased behavior.
Your boss doesn’t want to show his disliking and frustration towards you for some reason hence is venting it out in this way.
4. Your Boss Micromanages only You
A red flag!
Certain individuals are more controlling and want everything to go through their eyes and input. That’s understandable.
But if your boss doesn’t behave like that in his routine life but only becomes the best micromanager when dealing with you, it’s alarming.
Micro-management from your boss shows that he either doesn’t consider your expertise to be adequate to carry out the tasks on your own or he is trying to ridicule you by demoralizing you on purpose.
Whatever the case, it’s a clear sign of unfair treatment from your boss you should not be missing at all.
5. Discrepancies in Communication
You should keep an eye on the way your boss communicates with you.
If you constantly find your boss turning a deaf ear to your concerns or frequently experience dismissive remarks in contrast to your teammates, chances are it’s not an accident.
It should be more visible in meetings where you are likely to feel interruptions or being plain ignored by your boss. It signals unfair treatment and a lack of respect.
What to do when my boss treats me differently than others?
It’s easy to feel down when faced with unfair treatment in the workplace. You may keep pondering over all day why my boss treats me differently than others but it’s not going to change anything in your favor.
So stop feeling sorry for yourself and take charge of the situation to fix things yourself.
Without further ado, let’s go.
1. Be An Asset to Your Boss
If you can become an integral part of your workplace and are the only one who can do what you do, then your worth is going to be tenfold.
Your boss and your team can’t afford to lose you without sabotaging their chances big time.
Research your workplace and try to identify the most important skill set. Then strive to become an expert in that particular area to be a valuable asset to your team.
How to be an asset to your boss?
Let’s say your boss is running a project and there are certain areas like coordination where there is serious lag due to inadequate planning or not enough time to tackle it.
You can jump to this occasion and fill the gap yourself. Examine the situation and see what you can do to decrease the burden off your boss.
Here you can timely communicate with the stakeholders to keep the team updated about the progress, coordinate with the team members, keep a record of follow-ups or way forwards, and actively report to your boss.
You will very quickly become an asset to the project. Your involvement will be vital as you are the one managing the stakeholders timely.
2. Build Rapport With Your Boss With Common Interests
When wondering why my boss treats me differently than others, instead of just doing wild guesses, replace the negative situation altogether with building rapport.
Building rapport with your boss and colleagues will increase your workplace satisfaction and performance as well.
You can find common interests with your boss and use them as a base to improve your professional relationship.
We like people who are like us therefore finding common interests can prove to be great at boosting your relationship with your boss.
How to build rapport with your boss?
First, you need to see what type of person is your boss. What are his priorities and such?
When we like or dislike someone, it’s not usually because that person has no good or bad qualities, it is actually due to the presence of our prioritized qualities.
Let’s say your boss is very critical about the deadline. It means he may go easy on you for mistakes in your tasks but the deadline for him is like a matter of life and death.
What you must do in this case is to make sure to do everything to deliver the tasks before their deadlines.
This can work wonders for you if you pay attention. Just operate and behave according to the priorities of your boss and his resistance and foul behavior will not only keep on diminishing but you will also gain his trust and enter his good books.
3. Be Assertive about Your Boundaries
Boundaries are essential in relationships including professional ones for maintaining balance.
When these boundaries begin to be crossed, they are followed by unfavorable consequences and negative experiences.
When you feel your boss is crossing the boundaries and going the extra mile with unfair treatment, don’t simply sit back.
You shouldn’t fight but hold your ground firmly.
Just maintain an assertive voice tone and react accordingly to let him you didn’t like it and are not someone who will accept everything thrown his way.
Reacting with a somewhat assertive tone and body language sends a strong message without creating any unnecessary drama.
How to be assertive about your boundaries with your boss without being verbal
If you want to be assertive about your boundaries with your boss, especially without being verbal about it, you should incorporate these subtle things.
When your boss tries to attack you when there is not your fault simply hold your ground, hold eye contact, and reply with firm behavior.
Be direct in your words and assertive in your tone, with some dissatisfaction just enough to show your disliking. You would be wondering why is it effective.
If you behave in a squeaky manner, your boss sees you as an easy target even if he knows you are right.
He may even become a bully to you. Now just reverse it. When you show him resistance, it signals to him lowkey you are not someone to mess with. He will back off and will be mindful of his words for the next time.
4. Know Your Worth
First of all, don’t believe in stereotypes like a boss is always right or you should just take and take whatever he throws at you.
Wrong!
He’s just a person and is perfectly capable of being wrong. You work for the company and get paid, fair enough. There are no strings attached.
No one is doing any favor for anyone.
So don’t feel you are anything lesser submissive. You deserve respect even if you’re not a performer as it’s a basic human right.
Knowing your worth will boost your self-confidence and you will not be backed by any illusions.
How to recognize your worth
The most apparent clue is you are in the same company as your boss. You may be his junior due to lesser years of experience but he was the same at your age.
You are worthy that’s why the company hired you in the first place. You have several qualities your colleagues are not even aware of you. Their perception of you is just an opinion.
It is the projection of what they could assess based on their mind power, it does not define you in any way.
5. Focus on Your Work
When someone complains ‘My boss treats me differently than others’, the most common thing people do is get distracted with their work and lower their performance.
It is easy to feel down and upset and mourn the unfair treatment but it is not going to fix anything for you but rather damage you.
You are declining your performance, sabotaging your success big time, and ruining your mental health.
If you’re facing such an issue, make a priority on focusing your work.
It will help you a great deal by cutting off loose ends of distraction and also maintain your performance in the workplace.
How to focus on your work in an unfair workplace
Yes, we know that focusing on your work can be challenging in an environment with unfair treatment can be challenging. But maintaining focus and avoiding distractions is vital as not doing so can decline your performance sharply and may even endanger your job.
First of all, resist the urge of involving in gossip with your colleagues about unjust treatment in the workplace, as it’s not going to help you in any way but rather a waste of your valuable time and energy.
Think of this time as an opportunity to cultivate a strong mindset. Learn to manage stress levels with meditation, invest in productive habits, and your reasoning power to help you in the long run.
“My boss treats me differently than others”, what? Are you still pondering over it?
Focus on your work, not this. Okay?
6. Be Mindful of Your Actions
The most important step that you can take is to be aware of your actions and be sure you are not contributing anything to the unfair treatment.
Maybe you are not listening to your boss enough or have a clash with his personality, these sorts of things can increase the tension between you and your boss which leads to unjust treatment in the workplace.
Or maybe you initially did no wrong but still landed in the arena of bitterness, it is still very important to be mindful of your actions.
Because people once caught in the victim mentality find it very difficult to assess their actions and keep track of them which may subconsciously cause them to behave oddly.
How to be mindful of your actions
It is quite rare to find people with true quality of self-reflection. Such a quality can do wonders for you in your personal and professional development.
Life operates on certain set patterns. They are everywhere around you, waiting to be discovered. Study your surroundings, and your past, and try to examine how the events unfold, what action brings what, and such.
Cultivate a habit of first weighing your words before saying them out. Develop an analytical eye for your actions. Try to figure the how the action will unfold in the future, and what are the potential consequences.
it will make a master planner, a supreme strategist. You will be saving yourself a lot of effort and time focusing on relevant things and ruling out unpromising aspects.
7. Be Flexible in Your Nature
Being rigid and posing resistance to everything in the workplace sabotages you big time.
If you want to fix your situation of unjust treatment in the workplace, you need to find ways to make the situation favorable to you. And the single most important that can help you in such a case is flexibility.
Combating unjust behavior in the workplace requires making efforts in numerous ways as given in this article. But you can’t pull them off correctly unless you are willing to be flexible.
Handling stressful moments in the workplace, an unfavorable situation with your boss, and tolerating moments of unjust behavior in the workplace yet still keeping your composure requires you to be highly flexible.
If you can somehow manage these difficult times and follow the steps mentioned in this blog, you will win eventually.
How to be flexible in the workplace
Have you ever heard of a fixed and a growth mindset? If not then you should hear it out this time.
A fixed mindset is what most people are unfortunately sporting, carrying thoughts and beliefs and holding them very dear to themselves, refusing to let them go even the wrong ones.
It is no secret that people are stubborn about their beliefs but they only ruin their chances of success with this as it leads to a narrow perspective, unable to tackle problems from a different angle.
You must adopt a growth mindset if you are willing to climb the ladder of success.
First of all, remind yourself of your stubborn nature to drop your immediate guard and wall of defense. then encourage yourself to listen to others, and understand their point of view without being judgmental.
Step out of the world of illusions where you must defend your beliefs, values, and honor.
Be fine with making mistakes, learn to be patient with people, be empathic, ask questions, and encourage your growth.
Don’t fight for your ego, it’s merely satisfaction for some moments and not worth it in the long run. Save your energy for creativity and skill-building.
FAQ
Conclusion
That brings us to the end of your query ‘why my boss treats me differently than others’. Let’s have a quick recap about it.
First, we developed an understanding of what qualifies as unfair treatment in the workplace and how may we recognize it.
We listed down 5 simple yet notable signs that you are being treated unfairly at your workplace.
- The first one is that you are given big opportunities by your boss.
- You don’t find recognition for your hard work.
- Your boss tries to micromanage you and limits your creativity.
- Your boss shows signs of microaggressions when dealing with you.
- You don’t find your queries being addressed by your boss.
Once you are certain about being treated unjustly by your boss, make use of the following simple yet practical strategies to improve your situation.
- Strive to be an asset to your boss. Look for weak points in the organization and your team and try to fill them. This way you are going to become valuable and a key player to your boss.
- Build rapport with your boss by finding common interests with your boss. Try to find what his priorities are and then mold yourself according to them.
- Be firm about your boundaries. Don’t let your boss take you for granted just because he is a boss.
- Know your worth, and don’t think of yourself as inferior to your boss.
- Focus on your work instead of pondering over distractions and mourning over the unjust behavior you face in the workplace.
- Be mindful of your action. Evaluate your actions with as much honesty as possible. Make sure you are not projecting such behavior that would lead your boss to unfairly treat you.
- And last but not least, have a flexible, growth mindset. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Don’t defend your ego rather focus on learning. Practice empathy and learn to see things from different perspectives.
That’s the summary of everything we covered in this article. If you have any queries, feedback, or suggestions regarding the content, feel free to share them with us.
Why you do feel your boss treats you differently? Or have you ever found yourself in such a situation? Let us know in the comments below.
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